As a Twitter fan, I’ve noticed that Twitter is down a lot lately. Since Twitter is goddamn addictive, no Twitter is like no oxygen or got throw into vacuum of space for 10 second. So I tried to figure out what you, Twitter fan, should do while Twitter has gone to Fail Whale state.
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1. Freak out
Most common thing that human race would do when something isn’t suppose to happened but it happened. So whenever Twitter is currently down, first thing you’ll do is freak out. You can grab a pillow and scream at it like it’s son of a bitch who stole your bike.
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2. Masturbate
Don’t get me wrong though, I’m not a pervert guy…Well, maybe a little. Nevertheless, masturbating is the other method to kills some time when you are unable to tweeting. Can’t masturbate huh? Then go get some of your favorite celebrity pics or go find some porn in your dad cabinet. And fab over it. Can’t think of any hot celebrities? Megan Fox will be a good example of what I’m talking about.
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3. Buy some chicken from KFC
Another way to kill some time and plus you gotta eat delicious fried chickens. It’s pretty much like shoot one bird, got two birds. You can alternate KFC with McDonald, but the result may vary and colonel Sander doesn’t approve.
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4. Go sky-driving
Probably the best thing you will do while Twitter is down. If Twitter is up again while you still sky-driving, you can pretty much tweet from 5,000 ft above the earth surface. Just imagine how cool will that be. But I don’t recommend this for those who scared of height and pussies. Seriously, you might die before you actually on the plane.
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5. Twitter real life
Alternative way for those who addicted Twitter like Marijuana or crack. So yeah, all you have to do is simple. Get out there and say something like you always do on Twitter out loud. Will it work? Of course, as long as you didn’t say something racist. But you are allowed to say something that could hurts pathetic fan boy. Watch the video below for the guideline. Hope it’ll help. You’re welcome.
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That’s it for today folks. I might make the sequel of this article…not really. Anyway, I apologize that I couldn’t make a post frequently. Well, you gotta blame this on school, it’s their fault entirely.
credit: Flickr
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10 Comments
Masturbation solves all problems.
Snark´s last blog ..My Life is now Complete
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U can relate this article to when Gmail was down last week.
Optic´s last blog ..Music Monday ~ Miho Fukuhara – Let It Out
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go to facebook. ^^.
k´s last blog ..Gunpla cup noodles
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Omg real life Twitter is win ^__^
Gargron´s last blog ..Relationship between Araragi and Senjougahara
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Isnt Masturbation the universal answer to any kind of boredom?
Blowfish´s last blog ..1/8 GSC Kyouka-sama
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I’m looking for a Valentines– would you like to be my Valentines baby?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RIZdjT1472Y
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I’m looking for a Valentines– would you like to be my Valentines baby?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RIZdjT1472Y
I promise I can Transform something just for you!!
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I love you!! You freak!! Happy Valentine Day!!
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There’s a site out there asking the question “would you pay Megan Fox $300 to fart on your face?” My answer is no. Why– because I do not do drugs and associate human beings with alcohol or drugs– every human being is priceless. Although I may have ended up in bed with some strippers while drunk, like Megan, I have not gone to bed with many partners either– I’ve been bullied and pushed around for years; like Megan, I could not even begin to put a price on anyone I loved. I couldn’t pay you to fart on my face because I value you as a human with no price I could possibly afford! Now, this being said, you can fart on my face!
I am THE MACHINE
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I only have two months left because of bullying and corruption. I shared a lot of things with the public, including time theory and its relationship to vortex theory. Now, it’s time for some psychology — are we human? I do not believe in Christianity but it’s like David and Goliath– it’s impossible to fight a monster without some help!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCE1MeUZgNk
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